- Acknowledge and Acceptance- where are you emotionally, physically, psychologically, and mentally?
Getting help – you first have to recognise the need for help. Systematic abuse erodes your self- esteem which may cloud your self-worth from seeking support.
Listen to that Small Voice deep within that is still there reminding you that this treatment is abusive and not accurate of any healthy relationship. This affirmation will be the step you need in the right direction of getting help.
1 Kings 19:11-12 God speaks in a still small voice to those who are hurting, neglected, or abused. He is a loving Father and will not use the wind or earthquake to further add trauma to your situation. God roaring instructions to the needed and disadvantaged are often interpreted by those unable to sit with painful and abusive situations.
You have been extremely resilient and creative in suppressing this odious relationship from ending tragically. It is this ingenious strength you’ve mastered that is required now to draw on the Word for guidance. Reciting scriptures are powerful tools, Psalms 119: 41-52 here focus on to draw on God’s Strength. Look up scriptures to meditate on during the challenging moments.
- Forgiveness – you have to learn to forgive yourself for the position you are/were in. Shame and guilt are blinkers that may prevent emotional, psychological, and mental healing from taking place.
Working through these issues with a trained therapist experienced in working with victims of DA. It is extremely important in repairing your self-worth and dignity.
- Encouragement – Helping others is a great way of giving back to the community. Acquired skills and experience of seeing symptoms and the knowledge on how to get out and survive this! Make this awareness accessible to others now you’re safe. If not in a frontline capacity be a font of information to those seeking to provide a lifeline to others. Again this has to be at a stage when and if you’re able to, underpinned with therapeutic support.
Remember: Who you belong to!
‘I’m no longer a slave to FEAR, I AM A CHILD OF GOD!
By Jonathan David & Melissa Helser